Post by » Sketch on Jul 25, 2008 3:41:06 GMT
OK
This is a really stupid rant and I don't know why I'm even thinking about this right now, but I just need to talk to someone about this!
MY dilemma?
I DON'T KNOW IF I SHOULD GO OUT WITH GUYS!
Mkay, now that the topic's up, some details.
So I'm 13, right? I went to a Christian school for 5 years, so naturally I've been overly protected for awhile. Ladadada. Well, this year I was thrown into public school. It felt like I was a piece of meat getting tossed at a bunch of hungry lions XD In other words, I was eaten alive. For the first few weeks, I was in shock. The language, the music, just the common, every day topics that were perverted and just all new to me. But most of all, everyone has a boyfriend or a girlfriend! Except me of course. I was all like, "wtf no I am not going to have a boyfriend. They're stupid and you usually end up going out for a week and then you break up so it's pointless." But I would see my friends in the morning with their boyfriends, and before they left they'd always kiss( a cute kiss, mind you XD) and it just made me feel kind of jealous. And then I'd think I was ugly, even though I know I'm not ugly. I'd cry myself to sleep because there would be this feeling in my heart that made me feel so confused, because I didn't know if it was because I knew I wanted a boyfriend or because my heart was telling me to not get one. I'd think for hours on end in the dark, wondering if I was pretty, if I wanted a boyfriend, or if I didn't. I just can't take it anymore, and I just want some advice. I mean really, I'm 13. I know I don't need one, but I want to feel... well, wanted. Just to be loved. Ah, I don't even know what to say. Just, please, someone help me.
Please
This is a really stupid rant and I don't know why I'm even thinking about this right now, but I just need to talk to someone about this!
MY dilemma?
Mkay, now that the topic's up, some details.
So I'm 13, right? I went to a Christian school for 5 years, so naturally I've been overly protected for awhile. Ladadada. Well, this year I was thrown into public school. It felt like I was a piece of meat getting tossed at a bunch of hungry lions XD In other words, I was eaten alive. For the first few weeks, I was in shock. The language, the music, just the common, every day topics that were perverted and just all new to me. But most of all, everyone has a boyfriend or a girlfriend! Except me of course. I was all like, "wtf no I am not going to have a boyfriend. They're stupid and you usually end up going out for a week and then you break up so it's pointless." But I would see my friends in the morning with their boyfriends, and before they left they'd always kiss( a cute kiss, mind you XD) and it just made me feel kind of jealous. And then I'd think I was ugly, even though I know I'm not ugly. I'd cry myself to sleep because there would be this feeling in my heart that made me feel so confused, because I didn't know if it was because I knew I wanted a boyfriend or because my heart was telling me to not get one. I'd think for hours on end in the dark, wondering if I was pretty, if I wanted a boyfriend, or if I didn't. I just can't take it anymore, and I just want some advice. I mean really, I'm 13. I know I don't need one, but I want to feel... well, wanted. Just to be loved. Ah, I don't even know what to say. Just, please, someone help me.
Please